


kazuichi soda is a fucking dumbass

by gaybutokay



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Baking, Fluff, Humor, M/M, Water balloons, angry fuyuhiko, fhdsif, i have no clue how to tag, kazuichi is a dumbass, kazuichi is boyfriend goals, this ship is so under rated, very mild angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-16
Updated: 2020-06-16
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:00:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,159
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24750454
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gaybutokay/pseuds/gaybutokay
Summary: warning;; swearing, implied cheating, kazuichi is a dumbassfuyuhiko comes home from a long day of being angry at everything and everyone to his boyfriend grunting and moaning in their bathroom with condom wrappers scattered across the floor.  what the fuck have they gotten themselves into.
Relationships: Kuzuryu Fuyuhiko/Soda Kazuichi
Comments: 3
Kudos: 96





	kazuichi soda is a fucking dumbass

**Author's Note:**

> this is for my friend ilysm!! the omaru to my toki,,, the kazu to my kuzu,,, ily a lot

out of all things that fuyuhiko expected to see upon entering his room, a bunch of discarded condom wrappers across the floor was definitely nowhere near the top of his list..

fuyuhiko was typically an angry person. he would usually come back to their dorm room with a scowl already plastered across his (baby)face, some kind of annoyed grimace being thrown at kazuichi before he even muttered a ‘hello’. after the half-hearted greeting, fuyuhiko would, most of the time, flop himself down on his bed and let his eyes close. he wasn’t sleeping yet, but he was just collecting his anger before speaking to kazuichi, who by this time was probably staring at the floor and wondering why it ‘looked so weird today’. after fuyuhiko calmed himself down, he’d demand kazuichi’s undivided attention as he complained about his day,,, but with a smile on his face? he loved to rant about his day, especially since his pink haired himbo of a mechanic would hype him up, even sometimes encouraging the smaller boy to ‘confront’ the people pissing him off, be them professors, classmates, family, or even himself. he was nowhere near abusive, but he was just really. really bad. at being a boyfriend.

in fuyuhiko’s defense, however, who could blame him? it wasn’t like he just grew up as a happy-go-lucky guy! fuyuhiko generally didn’t like to be affectionate, or cuddly, or sweet and loving- at least when he was angry, but that was most of the time. he was never really a bad partner, more of just an angry one. it was hard for him to act like a loving partner when he was never treated with love as a child, and rather felt like an after thought compared to his perfect prodigy of a sister, natsumi.

kazuichi was a breath of fresh air, as he helped fuyuhiko with everything. though fuyuhiko felt like a complete after thought with everyone else in his life, the mechanic always made sure that fuyuhiko knew that he was loved.

after all, kazuichi knew all too well the pain of feeling like an outcast, or unwanted. it was the main reason that the two got together back in high school. though fuyuhiko did not have many friends, other than his childhood best friend (and honestly, sister in his heart) peko pekoyama, he always thought that kazuichi was interesting. kazuichi talked to a lot of people, but it didn’t seem like anyone spoke to him. he would talk to his buddies, mainly hajime hinata and ibuki mioda, but it seemed like they were most of the time not interested in talking to him. hajime was almost always busy with something, or someone, else. his best friend and girlfriend were always by his side, and kazuichi was honestly scared of nagito. nagito had some,,, issues. since fuyuhiko and kazuichi were always left alone, together, they decided to just be together without the alone part.

an unlikely pair, yes, but one that made the both of them very happy. kazuichi finally got the blonde babe of his dreams, even though fuyuhiko was a liiiiiittle different than what kazuichi imagined when he was younger. fuyuhiko finally got someone that called him talented and worthy, even if he was confused and / or annoyed by kazuichi roughly 100% of the time.

it was quite refreshing for both fuyuhiko and kazuichi to be with someone that actually understood their issues and trauma, and they helped each other cope a lot. fuyuhiko helped suck kazuichi out of his fantasy world while kazuichi helped bring fuyuhiko into one of his own. the pair could not have been any happier together, which is why it was terrifying when college acceptance letters came in.

fuyuhiko knew he was getting in- hell, he was smart as hell, rich as hell, and had a good life path planned. kazuichi, however, would need so many scholarships and financial aid to get into the same school as fuyuhiko, and he was terrified that the letter wouldn’t allow him in.

gladly, they let him in, and the money that the school didn’t pay in scholarships or that his parents could afford, fuyuhiko actually stepped up to plate and paid for some of his college. they’d assumed that they would get married one day, and if they had to pay for each other’s college a little bit, then so be it. fuyuhiko really loved his stupid himbo of a boyfriend, even if he couldn’t quite define why he did, and he was so glad to be by his side still.

being his best and only friend for years, letting kazuichi stay at his house whenever he needed to, always putting up with his bullshit, barely ever raising his voice at him, hell, even paying for his college, but fuyuhiko still came back to their shared dorm with condom wrappers lining the floor. this hurt. bad. it kind of felt like he had been cut in half with a sword, just the pain that coursed it’s way through his heart.

oh,,, was a sword joke too soon?

fuyuhiko didn’t cry, but he got a sinking feeling in his stomach of betrayal. he didn’t want to see this, much less did he want to be cheated on by kazuichi. he knew that his boyfriend was a dumbass, but dumb enough to cheat AND leave the wrappers scattered around the room?! This made every emotion in his (little) heart swell and boil to the surface, soon after overflowing in an array of tears in his eyes.

”...s-souda..? can you... are you here, kazuichi?”

kazuichi, the professional dumbass, had himself locked in a bathroom as grunts and sounds of either pleasure or extreme annoyance rang through the dorm room. fuyuhiko held his dorm key in hand as he walked to the bathroom that he heard the questionable noises coming from, holding his ear to the side of the wall. he couldn’t hear very well, but what he did hear was,,, quite questionable and damning on it’s own.

“...gahh… c’mon!! just... get it in there! i’m gonna run out of condoms, and then we’re gonna have to wait until i can finally get some more! i can’t fill you up if you’re acting like a bi- GOD!!! YOU’RE GETTING ME ALL WET!!”

...what the fuck…? not only did cheating not seem like something that kazuichi would do, but now he’s,,, is he being an asshole to whatever girl he’s with? what the hell is he doing?!

fuyuhiko and kazuichi hadn’t even gotten there yet- kazuichi was still pretty scared of letting himself be vulnerable around his boyfriend after a few years of dating. this literally seemed impossible; the man who was, one, not able to pull literally anyone (except for fuyuhiko), two, the man who was terrified of being touched by literally everyone (except for fuyuhiko), and three, the man who mad it abundantly clear that he was not interested in anyone on their campus (you guessed it, except for fuyuhiko). fuyuhiko so badly wanted to punch him in his stupid himbo face, maybe call peko and have her use him as a practice target, but he knew that he couldn’t. despite this,,, whatever, he still knew that deep down, he would never be able to stop lovi--

“GAH!! I GIVE UP!!! THIS IS TOO SLIPPERY!!! WAAAAAY TOO MUCH LUBE ON THESE-” kazuichi stepped out of the bathroom, his shirt drenched with water, his pants almost as drenched, his hair a mess, his eyes wet with what looked to be tears and water from the sink, and fifteen broken condoms on the sink. the floor was wet as well, like someone literally poured a bucket of water on both kazuichi and the entire bathroom. fuyuhiko peeked in, and what he saw, he would never forget.

nothing.

fuyuhiko literally saw nothing. no naked women or men sprawled across the floor in a lewd position, no magazine or phone with a lewd website open, not even an article of clothing on the floor. he turned his attention to a, now angry and flustered, kazuichi.

“what the fuck did you do, souda?!”

“uhh... w-well… um… well, i-ibuki told me that the best way to make a water balloon is with a condom…”

ibuki?! was fuyuhiko really being cheated on with someone who looked like a monster high reject?! “...so you decided to fuck her in our bathr-”

“WHAT?!” souda’s pink eyes shot open. he thought for a second about the accusation, which… started to make sense, even to him.

kazuichi knew that fuyuhiko grew jealous or insecure easily, but he didn’t expect for his boyfriend to assume the worst that quickly. it kind of hurt to know that he had no ‘confidence’ in kazuichi, as he instantly assumed he was cheating, but,,, kazuichi would do the same. he decided against a fight, and instead to just admit defeat.

“...no!! kuzu, you know that i wouldn’t do that to you… or, her, for that matter. she’s faaaar too louud. hurts my ears!!” souda turned around, walking back into the bathroom with a defeated expression. he showed fuyuhiko the broken rubbers scattered across the floor, sink, and bathtub. “...i just… so maybe i don’t know how to tie water balloons.”

fuyuhiko sighed as he stepped into the bathroom, rolling his eyes at the mess on the floor, sink, and of course, his boyfriend.

“...clean this shit up. now. i really don’t want you slippin’ and breakin’ your fuckin’ neck.” fuyuhiko tried to keep a serious expression, but he couldn’t help but let a light chuckle escape his lips. “...then, change your clothes… i had a good day, and i kind of just want to have an easy night.” fuyuhiko took a step out of the bathroom, closing the door and leaving kazuichi in there alone.

kazuichi retrieved the one dry towel left in the bathroom, starting to wipe down the floor of the bathroom as he thought of ways to apologize to fuyuhiko in a way that would,,, work. it definitely helped that fuyuhiko seemed to be in a very good mood, but it didn’t help that kazuichi was, again, a stupid dumbass. 

as kazuichi finished wiping down the floor with his now damp towel, he groaned as he threw it into the laundry bin. when he turned around to walk back to their room, the perfect apology hit him like a ton of bricks.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

kazuichi got out the brown sugar, the flour, the vegetable oil, and the baking powder from the pantry in their dorm room, trying to remember how his boyfriend described how he liked his karintō. he remembered that fuyuhiko liked having more white sugar than brown sugar on it, as it made it so much sweeter. he was so excited to show off his (awful) cooking skills! 

kazuichi meticulously and carefully poured some of the flour into the bowl, followed by a small pinch of baking powder. he tried to even everything out to exactly what the recipe said, reading the tiny print on his phone like it was gospel.

“...okay… got it! now, i need… dissolve the sugar in some hot water and add the flour and baking powder…”

kazuichi’s baking adventure was just as terrifying as he expected it to be, but by the end of it, he had finally successfully made fuyuhiko a plate of his favorite snack (that he most likely hadn’t had since they left for college), karintō! he was so proud of himself, and he knew damn well that fuyuhiko would be happy.

kazuichi slowly walked into the room, opening the door slowly and chuckling at the sight. fuyuhiko, eyes shut tight, asleep on the bed and holding onto kazuichi’s pillow. a good day must’ve worn him out, along with the stress of thinking his boyfriend- the most important person in his life to him- was cheating on him.

“...psst, ey, kuzu? i made you something~,” kazuichi sang, trying to wake up fuyuhiko.

fuyuhiko (reluctantly) woke up, looking up to see kazuichi in the doorway, still clad in his neon outfit and wet, but now also covered in sugar, flour, and oil (and finally, not the kind from his greasy hair). fuyuhiko then smelled the familiar dish, tossing the pillow to the side and sitting up. “...you made… did you make that?”

“hell yeah i did!! best boyfriend ever, right?!” kazuichi smirked, his entire body coated in an aura of confidence (and a layer of sweat).

“...change your fuckin’ clothes, you look like a wreck....” realizing soon after he spoke that he sounded a bit too harsh, especially since kazuichi looked like he was frowning in response, fuyuhiko cleared his throat before speaking again.

“...then get your ass in bed… i accept your apology.”

kazuichi frown was GONE instantly as he ran to change into an outfit less dirty before crawling next to fuyuhiko and handing him the plate. 

“...yeah, you really are the best boyfriend ever, dumbass.”

**Author's Note:**

> thank you so much for reading!  
> if u liked it pls consider leaving kudos or a comment uwu  
> if you have any requests, comment them or dm me on instagram @acabakane !!


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